What are my values? What is it, that I really live for? What would I be willing to go to the mat for? I've thought a lot about this and have realized that it is from my values that I set my course of life. They are my due north. For years, though my values were there, I was not living according to what I believed and was in emotional distress. I had no internal peace. Not realizing who I really was, or who God made to be, I felt divided and under a constant source of inner tension. I couldn't find that inner peace and happy place. I was caught in an internal struggle of trying to please those around me, instead of being who God made me to be. I lived my life on what was shifting sand, the opinions and acceptance of others. The irony of trying to please everyone is that you please no one and lose yourself in the process.
Living life in such a co-dependent way was a disaster, both for me emotionally, spiritually, and physically. I needed to find out who I really was created to be, and begin to live that out. 
It's been over the last 19 years that I have been discovering who the Lord has made me to be, what He's called me to, and how to live that out in HIs strength. I am living at 49 what feels like a dream. I am content, peaceful and living a life of purpose and calling. 
John 15:15 " You did not chose Me, but I chose you, that you would go and bear fruit, and your fruit would remain".....God has chosen us that we would go out and make a difference....By living out our God given purpose we can do that!